Not medical advice, and not a substitute for a real therapist. If your anxiety is running your life, please talk to a professional. This is just me being honest about a part of recovery nobody put on my discharge papers.
They can show you a scan where the inflammation is gone. They cannot show you a scan where the fear is gone, because there is no such image. The organ heals faster than the head does.
I have written before about the food fear, the specific dread of the next bite. This is the wider thing that sits underneath it. Every twinge in the upper belly becomes a question: is that it, is it starting again. You learn the exact spot the pain lives, and now your brain checks that spot all day like a tongue going back to a sore tooth. That is hypervigilance, and it is exhausting.
For a long time I thought it meant I was weak, or dramatic. It does not. When your body has genuinely tried to hurt you, staying on alert is the most logical thing in the world. The problem is that the alarm does not switch itself off just because the danger passed.
What actually helped me
Routine helped more than anything clever. Eating at the same times, sleeping at the same times, walking every day. A predictable body gives the anxious brain fewer surprises to react to.
Naming it helped. When the check-the-spot loop started, I learned to say, out loud sometimes, “this is anxiety, not my pancreas.” Not always true, but true often enough that saying it bought me a pause.
Talking to someone helped. In the book I only ever call him Mr. M, my therapist, and working with him was not a luxury add-on. It was part of the recovery, the same as the diet.
And slow breathing, the boring kind, longer out-breath than in-breath, actually does something when the panic spikes. It is not magic. It just tells the nervous system the emergency is over.
Stepan’s Rule: A twinge deserves attention, not a verdict. Notice it, breathe, and if it keeps up or changes, call your team. Then let the rest go, because most twinges are just a body that learned to be scared.
You are not the only one
If any of this sounds familiar, come sit with people who get it. The free community is where we talk about the parts of this that never make it onto a discharge sheet. Join us. You will feel less alone in about five minutes.